Monday, August 08, 2005
How not to meet women.
"So, is this the thirty-year-old corner?"
There are very few contexts in which this sentence could be deemed appropriate. Possible scenarios include being at a (moderately expensive) wine tasting that has been arranged chronologically or perhaps looking at old classic cars. However, being neither wine nor old cars, this statement was found to be patently offensive to both Leigh and myself.
Backtrack. Friend-of-a-friend's birthday party = knowing nobody else there but the birthday girl. Which was fine, really, because meeting new people is always fun. Until we realised that even though this girl was turning 27, she didn't graduate from my alma mater until 2004, which meant that.. right, everyone there was right out of college. Except for the 40-year-old guy who had a clothing business, yet had perhaps the ugliest shirt known to mankind on.
Awesome.
Whatever. We had drinks, we were sitting in front of the fan and talking to each other, and all was fine. Until this ... guy.. plopped down next to me to try to strike up a conversation. Oooh oooh guess what he did? Haa! He was a 2-L at Hahvard law, which just makes me wonder, what is it about me that screams, "I love lawyers!" Really. I'd like to know, and please be honest. Is there an invisible neon sign over my head? To add the cherry on top, he also just graduated from my alma mater, and he was in AEPi, which brings me to my second question, what is it about me that screams "Yeah baby, I love AEPi" (because I don't, at all).
Predictably, he was boring to talk to. Plus, he had ugly shoes and an ugly belt on. So after a few polite but monosyllabic responses to all his damn questions, he finally left, only to come back over (as his friend had sat down on the other side of Leigh), only to ask, "So, is this the 30-year-old corner?"
Fucker. He's gonna get nowhere in life with that sort of stupidity.
There are very few contexts in which this sentence could be deemed appropriate. Possible scenarios include being at a (moderately expensive) wine tasting that has been arranged chronologically or perhaps looking at old classic cars. However, being neither wine nor old cars, this statement was found to be patently offensive to both Leigh and myself.
Backtrack. Friend-of-a-friend's birthday party = knowing nobody else there but the birthday girl. Which was fine, really, because meeting new people is always fun. Until we realised that even though this girl was turning 27, she didn't graduate from my alma mater until 2004, which meant that.. right, everyone there was right out of college. Except for the 40-year-old guy who had a clothing business, yet had perhaps the ugliest shirt known to mankind on.
Awesome.
Whatever. We had drinks, we were sitting in front of the fan and talking to each other, and all was fine. Until this ... guy.. plopped down next to me to try to strike up a conversation. Oooh oooh guess what he did? Haa! He was a 2-L at Hahvard law, which just makes me wonder, what is it about me that screams, "I love lawyers!" Really. I'd like to know, and please be honest. Is there an invisible neon sign over my head? To add the cherry on top, he also just graduated from my alma mater, and he was in AEPi, which brings me to my second question, what is it about me that screams "Yeah baby, I love AEPi" (because I don't, at all).
Predictably, he was boring to talk to. Plus, he had ugly shoes and an ugly belt on. So after a few polite but monosyllabic responses to all his damn questions, he finally left, only to come back over (as his friend had sat down on the other side of Leigh), only to ask, "So, is this the 30-year-old corner?"
Fucker. He's gonna get nowhere in life with that sort of stupidity.
Gloria 10:58 AM
1 Comments:
It's all a question of audience. Now if a guy came up to me and my friends saying that, we'd say, "But of course it is." Then again the number is a bit off. When I go out, most guys assume I'm more like 27. Thank you mom and dad for the lovely genes ... and Miss Clairol for the root coverage.
